Just Around the River Bend

In which, I use Disney to fully describe my feelings

This will actually probably happen quite frequently since I'm a huge Disney fan. I grew up in the middle of the Disney renaissance, with Beauty and the Beast, the Little Mermaid, and, my absolute most-favorite movie of all time hands-down - the Lion King. It just doesn't get any better than hakuna matata, my friends.

Pocahontas has grabbed my attention again recently, mainly for its absolutely fabulous lyrics and music (and the always hilarious duo of Meeko and Flit). I mean, when you have a line like, "With all you got in ya boys, Dig up Virginia boys!' you're pretty much an absolute genius.

One of my most-favorite songs in Pocahontas is Just Around the River Bend. Her father wants her to settle down and be 'steady as the beating drum,' building a family and a stable life. She disagrees and yearns for the unknown, whatever life's got for her just around the river bend.

It's funny, because, as a pragmatic little 7-year-old, when I first saw the movie, I used to think of Pocahontas as selfish and foolish, throwing away safety and security just for excitement and adventure. And what ended up happening? John Smith got shot and they both ended up with broken hearts! Don't look to closely at my angst over this, I was a very strange child.

Rediscovering these songs over the past few years was a joy, like finding $20 in a jacket you hadn't worn in forever. Hearing Just Around the River Bend again, it was amazing to examine how my heart and outlook on life had changed.

We're leaving for Ecuador in three weeks. It's definitely 'around the river bend.' I feel excited and scared and hesitant and elated and unsure and confident, all in one big messy lump. A friend described it as fascinating and fun and big and scary and wonderful - to which I said yes! And my inner 7-year-old is telling me to not be ridiculous, that life isn't meant to be those things. Life is meant to be stable, to be secure. Not unknown and scary.

I don't have a concerned father telling me to give up my childish ways and settle into life (although, maybe he should've told me to STICK with my childish ways), but I do have friends and family who don't understand our decision. That's fine, I don't expect everyone to understand. It's not the usual life choice, that's for sure.

We want to see what's beyond our shore, beyond our current horizon. We want to experience it, taste it fully, live life outside of the safe-zone, the zone where we know all the variables. That's a little weird, I know, but that's where we are. There's nothing wrong with the life we're leaving, the life that so many people live. It's a good life. We just want something different. Something a little further down the river.

And who knows, maybe my inner 7-year-old will actually start acting her age.